Sunday, January 29, 2012

Tears were flowing

Last night we watched the movie 50/50 about a young guy with a rare cancer who has a 50/50 chance of surviving.  I was surprised DH picked that one over a political thriller.  The movie shows how the guy has to deal with the fact that he might be dying ( he concludes that he IS dying) and how people around him change - some sticking by him, some not.  I looked over to see DH crying - in fact crying a lot.  I realized how much he's been covering up his fears.  I'm hanging on to what the docs said about "90%" chance of cure and the fact that he has been negative since Week 4.  But I realize he's not going to believe he's cured until he's much further along.  I'm glad we watched that movie.  Got to get the feelings out.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

Reality Therapy

I just read Hep C Woman's blog and she said the Hep C came back even though she had negative readings with the 3-drug therapy.  She started a few weeks b/4 DH.  So indeed we must be ever vigilant.  It CAN come back.  DH has only 2 more Inteferon shots to go.  But, just like with the last go-round, the last few shots seem to be the hardest.  He CARRIES ON that he doesn't want to take the shot.  I feel like "Coach" at the end, and not necessarily a nice coach.  I tell him he can't quit now.  And I know he won't.  We're letting ourselves think he's cured.   I think that's OK.  It feels hopeful.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sleepy Sunday

Sunday afternoon.  DH is asleep.  So often, DH sleeps a lot on Sunday after giving himself the Inteferon shot on Saturday night.  Today he's been sleeping a little more than usual.  Can't wait for this all to be over.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Trudging along...

Here we are in the new year.  DH gave himself the Inteferon shot last night.  He has 4 more to go (only IF the doctor allows him to stop at 24 weeks).  He's still taking the Ribavarin daily, still feeling exhausted each week after the Inteferon.  I know he's not going to believe he's cured until he stays virus free for several months after the treatment is over.  Last night he said "I'm never going to be the same."  I agreed with him.  I observed that after the 1st round of treatment, he was not his "old self" even several months after the treatment stopped.  I imagine it will be many months, if not years, before he gets back to being "Mr. SuperFit" - if he ever does.  Guess we're going to have to learn to be grateful for what we DO have - as in, NOT having HepC if and when he gets to that point for sure (I believe he WILL).